Adventure Scrolls
by asher pointdexter
Summary: Based on what me and some buddies in Tumblr thought of. This is a series of stories of the Adventure Time cast and Skyrim characters live their lives co-existing with each other. Stories are (Mostly) non-sequential and can be read in any order.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:**

_Adventure Scrolls begun when I and a friend of mine in Tumblr thought how it would be if AT and the Elder Scrolls: Skyrim would mix. It started out when someone mentioned a crackship of Elenwen and Finn, and I and my buddy then thought of shipping Marceline and Princess Bubblegum with Serana. Eventually it led to me writing up some Adventure Scrolls stories, where it involves the wonderful AT cast and the characters in Skyrim living their days, visiting each other and occasionally working alongside._

_These stories are often in non-sequential order and can be read in any order, and some stories may or may not be inspired OR based on episodes from other cartoon shows and or videos from YouTube. None the less these are stories made up by me and my friend in Tumblr, enjoy._

**OHH! And here are some things that probably happened when and after the Adventure Time-verse and the Elder Scrolls-verse combined:**

_-Some magical anomaly in the multiverse caused the two universes, The Adventure Time-verse; Earth (Ooo and Aaa) and Mundus with the world of Tamriel to combine. Altering some of the geography of both worlds_

_-Finn and the Dragonborn are bestfriends and from time to time go adventuring together._

_-Finn is a member of the Companions despite his young age, making him the youngest member. _

_-The Skyrim main quest line and the Civil War was ongoing during the earlier days of the universes just mixed. Finn and friends along with the Dovahkiin worked together to stop Alduin; but while that was happening The Lich also tried to take over parts of Tamriel but when faced with Alduin he tired to control him. But instead was enslaved by Alduin who made him cause havoc by unleashing undead hordes throughout Skyrim._

_-The Civil War was abated when the AT Crew convinced both sides to put aside their differences help stop The Lich's hordes from causing more havoc and chaos._

_-After The Lich and Alduin were defeated, a peace treaty made with Princess Bubblegum, Prince Gumball, and the other Royalties of Ooo and Aaa to establish a peaceful bond between the Imperials and the Stromcloaks. Both Empire and Stormcloarks sides also maintain a good neighborly-esque relationship with their other worldly neighbors. Plus The Lich is now under control of Durnehviir… And the Thalmor continue being jerks._

_-Even the Dawnguard and Clan Volkihar had to put their differences aside during the crisis. Clan Volkihar rule over and control the Vampiric population from doing and bad while The Dawnguard maintain the law when it comes to evil undead creatures and spirits; in Tamriel, Ooo, or Aaa to where they have expanded. Plus Lord Harkon called of his quest to blot out the sun._

_-Princess Bubblegum, Marceline, and Serana are in an oh-so-ever romantic relationship._

_-Prince Gumball is married to Jarl Elisif, and Fionna became Gumball and Elisif's newest Housecarl._

_-Ooo and Aaa denizens have also migrated to Tamriel, though only in Skyrim so far._

_-People of Tamriel have also migrated to Ooo and Aaa as well._

_-Ice King has a VERY bad reputation in Skyrim because of him trying to kidnap one of the Jarls into marriage. Ice Queen also previously had a bad rap, but when she attempted to kidnap Jarl Balgruuf the Dovahkiin offered to be Ice Queen's new lover; Ice Queen and Dovahkiin now live together at Breezehome in Whiterun._

_-Solitude is now also populated with Candy People from Aaa because of Prince Gumball moving in with his new wife, during the crisis the Candy Kingdom of Aaa was heavily damaged by Dragons. Its currently rebuilt and Peppermint Maid currently rules over it._

_-Princess Bubblegum is HATED by the College of Winterhold._

_-Occasionally PB would invited the Jarls of Skyrim, even Harkon (except Elisif, she's got her Bubba Gumball) in a retreat camp in Ooo where they have sleepovers and basically do best buddy stuff. PB also shows off TV Shows, Music, Movies, Video Games, and other modern forms of entertainment to them._

_-Finn and Elenwen are dating… YEP! That's right they're in a relationship._

_-Finn spends his Mondays and Tuesdays working with the Companions, Wednesdays and Thursdays he adventures and hangs out with Dovahkiin (Though sometime Dovahkiin also travels to Ooo and Aaa). Fridays and Saturdays he spends time and dates with Elenwen. And in Sundays Finn relaxes and or visits the Shrines of Azura and or Meridia, he worships them._

_And those are what me and my friends would think would happen. Enjoy and do leave reviews or even suggestions. I may think of more stories in the future._


	2. The Lemons visit Dragonsreach

It has been months since the Adventure Time worlds Ooo and Aaa have met with the world of Nirn. With The Lich defeated and now under control of Durnehviir and the world eating Dragon God Alduin banished, with the combined efforts of the Dragonborn with Finn and his friends.

The Civil War is over; instead a permanent Peace Treaty has been established between the Imperials and the Stormcloaks thanks to them having to work together to stop the Lich from destroying all life in Tamriel. And with the royalties of Ooo and Aaa making a permanent Peace Treaty, though the Thalmor still continue being jerks.

Even The Dawnguard and Clan Volkihar had to set aside their differences and abide by the treaty, and Harkon then called of his quest to blot the sun.

Every three months the royalties of Ooo, Aaa, and Skyrim have meetings to make sure peace is maintained, they visit each other's kingdoms and everyone seems to have a neighborly-esque relationship. And recently Earl of Lemongrab and Lady Lemonsnatch visit Dragonsreach in Whiterun, what follows is the usual thing one can expect from Lemongrab and snatch:

**Lemongrab:** "This castle and this settlement; Whiterun is in unacceptable conditions, Dragons constantly attack, the citizens tend to be annoying; so are the Guards, AND THAT DOOR IN THE BASEMENT KEEPS WHISPERING TO MEEEEEEEEEEE! WHISPERING NON-SEEEEEEEEEENSE! *Snatches Hrongar's meal*

**Lemonsnatch:** "I agree, I think the Jarl can't keep things under control."

**Balgruuf:** "O REALLY? *walks to Lemongrab and snatch* Listen well, Fatass and Slut!  
I'm Jarl Balgruuf,  
And,  
I,  
Be, *starts rapping*  
** BALLIN'!**  
**Ballin'!**  
**BALLIN'!**  
**Jarl Ballin'!** *everyone else except Lemongrab and Lemonsnatch start dancing along*  
**Baaaallin'! Baaalin'!**  
**SWAG.**  
**Dumbasses I'm LORD of the Rings!**  
**I'm the Jarl of Whiterun!**  
**Holla if you need me.**  
**Haters gonna hate.**  
_OWW!_  
**Haters gonna hate.**  
_OWW!_  
**Bitches gonna hate.**  
_OWW!_  
**Yo momma's gonna hate**.  
_OWW!_  
**Swag.**  
_OWW!_  
**Swag.**  
_OWW!_  
**Swag.**  
_OWW!_  
**Swag.**

**Holla if you need me.**  
**Holla if you need me.**  
**Reefer. **  
Bitches."

Lemongrab and Lemonsnatch just sit still shocked at what just happened.


	3. New Apprentices

What was supposed to be a normal or regular day in the village of Riverwood was ruined and was now in chaos as large groups of bandits, accompanied by a few conjurers. Were attacking Riverwood thinking to raid and or claim the village as theirs, the detachment of Whiterun Guards stationed there were not doing well as the bandits outnumbered them three to one.

Though the guards put up a good fight as the streets were also riddled with the bodies of the bandits; even some of the magic users who were attacking. Most of the civilians were in their homes hiding, almost all but one; Faendal the local Bosmer Archer is doing his best to fend off the attackers. Alas he was then pinned down by one of the hostile Mages, the guards could not lend a hand as they were busy and Faendal was practically out of arrows and was cowering behind some logs near the mill.

The Mage ordered one of the raiders to approach and kill the archer but just as the raider turned around and was about to strike Faendal who shielded himself with his arms, a green arrow struck the bandit's head; killing him. And another at the Mage who ordered that bandit, Faendal looked up to see Huntress Wizard standing on the roof of the mill, with a Glass arrow in one hand and a Glass Bow on the other. She looked down on Faendal and told to him.

**Huntress Wizard:** "You know, hiding won't save you."

**Faendal:** "Hey, it's you! From Wizard Battle I saw you when I was at Ooo."

She conjured a quiver of arrows and threw it to Faendal, then leaped on to the streets to assist the guards, and in no time she quickly dispatched the bandits that were outnumbering a group of guards and another group with her magic trying to break in the Riverwood Trader. The guards were now getting a bead on the attackers; thanks to the help of Huntress, as Faendal began to fight again but heard a cry for help, it was Sven the Bard. Who was being ganged up by two bandits as one was about strike down Sven. Faendal shot an arrow to one of the bandit's head and the other bandit was distracted; to which Sven took the advantage and stabbed the attacker in the throat with his dagger.

**Sven:** "You know I didn't need your help."

**Faendal:** "Says the one who yelled 'HELP! Help MEEEE!'"

**Hilde:** "HEEEEEEELP!"

Hilde, Sven's mother was heard screaming for help as she was being dragged by a Bandit.

**Sven:** "MOTHER!" *Rushes to bandit* LET HER GO!"

**Faendal:** "HEY WAIT!"

The bandit noticed Sven attempting to rescue his mother but the bandit turned around to hold Hilde in knife point.

**Bandit:** "Back off Mama's Boy, or she ge-"

A Glass Arrow pierced the bandit's head and Sven and Faendal see it was Huntress Wizard once again, she looked briefly at the two and Hilde and quickly ran off to the exit of Riverwood. Sven rushed to comfort his mother and Faendal looked around to see things alot more calmer, realizing the all the attacking bandits are dead while some were being cuffed by the guards. After comforting his mother, Hilde told her son that she was going to head home to calm herself down and Sven asked Faendal.

**Sven:** "Who was that green Elf?"

**Faendal:** "Have you been living under a rock? That's Huntress Wizard; THE Huntress Wizard. You know? Wizard Battle which was held at the land of Ooo-"

Before finishing, Sven quickly ran off to the woods.

**Faendal:** "H-HEY! WHERE' YOU GOING!?"

**Sven:** "I HAVE TO FIND HER! AND THANK HER!"

**Faendal:** "WAIT! COME BACK!… Dammit."

Faendal also ran to catch up with Sven, though they both did not like each other. Faendal did not want Sven; Hilde's son to run off into the woods to get killed by a Mudcrab.

#####

Though the bandit raid was a failure, the ones who lead the raid were two Mages who ran off to escape the guards and Huntress Wizard.

**Mage:** "'Let's lead a bandit raid to Riverwood, It'll be easy, we'll raid it, loot the town, and even make it ours. It'll be EASY!' AND THEN HUNTRESS WIZARD SHOWED UP AND WE RAN LIKE CHICKENS BECAUSE WE KNEW SHE'D KICK OUR ASSES!"

**Conjurer:** "OH SHUT UP AND KEEP RUNNING I'AM SURE WE LOSED 'EM WE'LL JUST RUN OFF TO FALKREATH! NO BOUNTY FOR US THERE!"

**Mage:** "THIS WAS A STUPID IDEA-"

A Glass Arrow struck the Mage's throat as he gurgled her last breath and fell to the ground dead. The Conjurer accompanying her panicked knowing who shot that arrow and conjured a sword and casted a fortify spell on himself, Sven kept running hoping to find Huntress Wizard but then stopped when he saw the Conjurer. He knew it was one of the magic users who lead the raid and then something grabbed Sven.

It was Faendal, who dragged Sven behind a tree.

**Faendal:** "You idiot do you realize running of into the woods like this will get yourself killed? What would your mother feel knowing you ran off like this and found dead the following day?"

**Sven:** "I was just trying to-"

**Feandal:** "Show gratitude to Huntress Wizard, I know but it's best we-"

Faendal and Sven heard a quiet rustling on top of the tree they were hiding behind with and saw Huntress Wizard silently leaped down and slowly approach the Conjurer. They both stopped talking as they knew what she was about to do, she approached the Conjurer, held the hilt of her Glass Sword and quickly unsheathed it with a loud _*SHING!*_ sound. The panicking conjurer knew who it was and quickly turned around to swing his conjured sword at her while yelling.

Huntress Wizard blocked the attack with her blade and kicked the conjurer in the stomach to giving both of them some distance, the conjurer was about to cast a spell; likely summoning an Atronach but Huntress slashed at the conjurer with her Glass Sword. The conjurer yelled in pain as his fortify spell did very little as it turns out Huntress' Glass Sword is enchanted with drain health and magicka. The conjurer could not cast any spells, was bleeding out, and was hacking and slashing away at Huntress who was dodging and or blocking the attacks.

Finally the Huntress thrusted her sword into the guy's stomach who gurgled out blood and she withdrew her sword and decapitated the conjurer's head as his lifeless body lies dead, and Huntress Wizard picks up the guy's head and approached the other dead mage and cut her head of aswell and held too. Then she sheathed her sword, using her magic or skills she quickly sprinted off to the road leading to Whiterun while also leaping from tree to tree. Sven and Faendal went out of hiding and were amazed at what they just witnessed.

**Sven:** "Faendal, where does she usually go to?"

**Faendal:** "She lives in Wizard City."

**Sven:** "Is that supposed to be in Winterhold?"

**Faendal:** "No you uncultured swine in Ooo!, Why? You plan on traveling?"

**Sven:** "Do you know your way around 'Ooo'?"

**Faendal:** "Yeah… I guess I know where this is leading too…"

_*A few days later*_

At Ooo and Aaa were connected to each other, and soon after one certain event Ooo and Aaa were now two continents connected together and were now in the world of Nirn. Ooo and Aaa is now one BIG continent Tamriel, which anyone can travel through ship. Many of Tamriel's inhabitants have also traveled and or migrated to Ooo and Aaa , for Sven and Faendal's case they've discussed about their plans to meet Huntress Wizard in Wizard City. Faendal agreed to come along since he knew more about Ooo more than Sven would ever know; after reaching Wizard City they both knew one thing HUGE thing about Wizard City.

It has become a Thalmor hub in Ooo (same for Aaa's Wizard CIty), they saw many Ooo denizens walking in the streets but they saw lots of Thalmor Justiciars patrolling and wandering the streets, many walls in the buildings have been decorated and riddled with Thalmor propaganda posters and recently erected billboards showing more propaganda how the Aldmeri Dominion is here to help, and messages discouraging the worship of Talos. One thing Wizard City and the Aldmeri Dominion had in common is they have an Elitist attitude and look down on those lower than them. On the plus side many Bretons from High Rock have also sought residence or education in Wizard City, to even out Wizard City's new High Elf population.

After asking around (and getting a few stink eyes from Thalmor Justiciars) they have arrived at the apartment complex where Huntress Wizard lives.

Sven and Faendal walked into the apartment, asked which room she resided in and approached the door and Sven knocked on it.

Huntress Wizard was watching some online videos in her computer and heard the knock on the door, feeling a bit irritated she walked over to answer the knock and opened the door to see Sven and Faendal.

_*Spongebob song: Witty Fellow plays*_

**Sven:** "Ah you must be Huntress Wizard, I'am Sven the bard at the Sleeping Giant Inn. And this is my *ahem* 'friend' Faendal, he works at Riverwood mill."

**Faendal:** "Hello."

**Huntress Wizard:** "Do I know you two? I don't think we've ever met. And you two better have a reason to knock at my door - Wait Riverwood? Oh Now I remember, yeah I did remember you two now."

**Faendal:** "Yes; and Sven here has something he's been willing to tell you."

**Sven:** "Yes, what you did to help Riverwood from that raid is heroic and admirable. And it is my honor to say… Thank you very much.

_*Faendal facepalms*_

**Huntress Wizard:** "…..Wait is that it? Just 'Thank you' well uhhhjee sure you're welcome I guess?"

**Sven:** "BUT WAIT! I just also want to mention that me and Faendal We, We really are impressed by your prowess I mean the way you handled those bandits and those Spellcasters. I can see why Faendal is a fan of you. Oh and I also wanted to give you *grunts* THIS! *accidentally drops Dragon scales* Whoops."

**Huntress Wizard:** "Uhhmmm Thanks again?"

**Sven:** "ONE! ONE LAST THING!…. Oh great Huntress Wizard may I request you help us, train us, make Me and Faendal heroes like you."

**Faendal:** "Wait! What?!"

**Sven:** "The way we fought during the Riverwood raid was unacceptable, so please train Me and Faendal here in your ways."

**Faendal:** "WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! THERE SVEN! I thought you just wanted to travel to Ooo just to say Please and Thank you to Huntress Wizard, not become her apprentice! And what do you mean the way 'WE' fought during the attack at Riverwood is unacceptable? I did my best you know."

**Sven:** "Which is why I'am asking Huntress Wizard, right now. *turns to Huntress* So please Huntress Wizard take us under wing… Make us heroes like you." *smiles widely*

**Huntress Wizard:** "…No" *slams door*

**Faendal:** "Well that sure went well no come on let just head ho-"

Sven then knocked on the door again to which Huntress opened but immediately closed but, before closing it Sven grabbed the door, surprisingly ripped it off from it's hinges, and threw it from a window. Faendal was shocked at what he just witnessed and Sven pulled out a coin purse containing 100,000 gold coins.

Both Huntress and Faendal questioned how and where Sven was able to acquire a hundred thousand gold pieces, but Huntress thought and realize. If Sven is willing to pay that much money just for her to make them her apprentices to be better fighters; she could use all of that money to train in crafting, gather Dragon scales, and use the acquired training to craft Dragon Scale Armor.

And immediately Huntress Wizard blurted out.

**Huntress Wizard:** "YES!… I mean *ahem* allright, since you're sooooo insistent then so be it. I'll take you two under my wing as 'Apprentices'."

**Faendal:** "WHAT?! NO! I did not sign up to be inducted-"

**Sven:** "We accept, Faendal could use some new skills AND more 'advanced' archery."

**Faendal:** "BUT-BUT- I-"

**Huntress Wizard: **"Then it's settled you two will be inducted into The Blades, ready yourselves and head back to your homes in Skyrim. We'll begin training tomorrow; it's Wednesday tomorrow and every Wednesdays to Fridays I train and teach the recruits combat training. And how to kill a flying lizard.I'am a Training Officer for the Blades just for you to know."

**Faendal:** "But… Grrr Sven!"

**Sven:** "Hey, who knows you might actually enjoy it."

**Faendal:** "Hunting DRAGONS?!"

**Sven:** "Hey we don't always have to I mean we recently The Blades work with the Dragonborn and most recently protecting the royalties of Ooo and Aaa."

**Huntress Wizard:** "Exactly, and recently my 'boss' Delphine took up the job to escort and bring The Royal Tarts from Ooo's one and only Princess Bubblegum. And deliver it 'em to Solitude's married ruling couple; Elisif and Bubba Gumball."

**Faendal:** *Grumbles*

**Huntress Wizard:** "Anyways, head home back to Skyrim and give me your maps to Skyrim. *Marks location to Skyhaven Temple* Meet me there in Skyhaven Temple, that's where the Blades of Skyrim stationed. Meet me there tomorrow. Now go." *Forms magical barrier around missing door hinges*

**Faendal:** "Sven I. DID NOT!-"

**Sven:** "Calm down already I'am sure you'll find Blades training very useful."

**Faendal:** "Grrr, Let's just go. The next ship back to Skyrim leaves within two hours."

Faendal and Sven head to the ship sailing for Tamriel to head home and prepare for their new training.

#####

The next day Faendal and Sven made their way to Skyhaven Temple where they see many of the recruits and other members. One of the highly notable members seen training in the courtyard are the Blue-Skinned Marauders, a bunch of armored crusaders and Wizards from Ooo and Aaa, and Scorcher who also joined the Blades; being the Blades' resident Pyromancer. Sven and Faendal saw Huntress Wizard waving to them and telling them to follow her to another part of the courtyard, which was big and spacious; likely she reserved it for both of them.

_*TRAINING MONTAGE TIME!* _

_*Music plays:__ watch?v=1mClbxsB3nI__ *_

A table was set up between Sven and Faendal and Huntress Wizard, the table had a modern looking Tactical Crossbow, a Special Forces Shovel, and a .44 Revolver.

**Huntress Wizard:** "Lesson one; choosing your weapon. Since you two are now Blades under my watch it's time for you two to arm yourselves with better gear. SO choose your weapon."

Sven and Faendal both look at the table and immediately Faendal chose the Tactical Crossbow, Faendal though looked at the .44 Revolver curiously which Huntress Wizard noticed and stated.

**Huntress Wizard:** "That there's called a Gun, best you just stick to that crossbow. You know how to use that right?"

**Faendal:** "Yeah"

**Huntress Wizard:** "Good, I'll explain to you and your fellow Blades what a gun is next time."

Sven on the other hand was pondering whether to choose the Special Forces Shovel which looked like a good melee weapon and tool, or the gun which he believes Huntress Wizard will teach him how to use. Instead Sven became nervous and outright lifted the table up his head with amazing strength, Faendal was dumbfounded and facepalmed and Huntress had a disappointed look on her face and slapped Sven in the face.

_*Next Scene*_

Huntress had Sven instructed on using his new weapon, Special Forces Shovel. And Sven was practicing on a dummy across the training grounds, away from Huntress and Faendal.

**Huntress Wizard:** "Lesson two; using your weapon. Shoot that target from this distance."

Huntress whipped out a .44 Revolver from a holster in her belt and shot the dummy's head from a long distance, which Faendal was impressed and whistled, Faendal knew it was his turn to shot the target with his new crossbow. He had trouble loading the bolt but eventually loaded up the bolt and took the shot; but missed. He loaded another bolt and shot but missed, and another and another until he ran out of crossbow bolts.

**Huntress Wizard:** "Ahem, here use this *hands Grenade* Pull the pin of that explosive, throw it at the target and then boom."

**Faendal:** "Ohh I see, I understand how this works."

Faendal happily said, as he pulled the pin of the grenade and threw it at the target… Unfortunately Faendal only threw the pin but now held the now active grenade, Huntress Wizard was playing around with her Revolver a bit till she noticed Faendal holding the live grenade and Faendal himself also noticed he did not throw the grenade. Before any reaction *BOOM!* the grenade exploded and both Huntress and Faendal were neither killed nor dead but were entirely covered in scorch marks and soot in a cartoony sense and fashion. Huntress was obviously furious and glared angrily at Faendal and he as well earned a slap in the face from Huntress Wizard.

Sven on the other hand was oblivious to what happened and was enjoying his new weapon very much until he swung too hard his Special Forces Shovel flew from his hand and hit Huntress in the head who let out a loud cry of pain and an _"OWW!"._ Huntress then glared at Sven angrily to which Sven goofily smiled and said sorry.

_*Next Scene*_

**Huntress Wizard:** "Lesson three; your new gear or armor. You two are obviously going to have to wear better gear and protection if you're to work as Blades, you can either equip these standard issue Blades Armor. Or choose from those crates and chest containing different armor sets which I found from looting trips."

Sven and Faendal looked at the mannequins wearing Blades Armor but instead decided to look at the chests and crates. After a half hour Huntress was just reading a book and sipping some Black-Briar Reserve till Sven and Faendal came back, Huntress glanced at them and she spat her drink and dropped her book in surprise.

_*Previous Music stops*_

_*Angelic Choir*_

She saw Sven wearing Dragon Scale Armor which fitted him well and Faendal was wearing what appeared to be Grey Military grade armor, a brown duster/overcoat, and rodeo jeans; basically Faendal was wearing an outfit that looked like the NCR Ranger combat armor from Fallout: New Vegas only no helmet.

**Huntress Wizard:** "Faendal, where did you get that armor?"

**Faendal:** "Found it in one of the crates, I could not tell but something in my mind said 'This totally fits me well'."

Huntress looked at Sven and Faendal wearing their new gear then she looked at them from top to bottom until. She noticed the having large and visible holes in the crotch of their gear… She looked horrified, then placed her hands in her face, slumped to the ground, and started sobbing softly.

#####

_*Next Scene* _

_*Skyrim Tavern Music plays*_

It was now twelve noon in Skyrim and everyone who was training at the courtyard of Skyhaven Temple were at the dining hall of the temple. Both the members and newer and recent recruits were all bonding, chatting, laughing, and generally sharing jokes aswell. Scorcher even decided to put some booze in his mouth, then spit it out through the small flames emitting from his hands making a little Fire Show which everyone was impressed with. Although MOST of the members training were in the dining hall, Sven and Faendal were still outside at the courtyard; instructed by Huntress Wizard to keep on training. Huntress Wizard however was inside the temple sitting in the dining hall sulking herself in Honningbrew and Black-Briar Mead sitting between her and a table was Esbern, The Blade's Lore Master.

**Huntress Wizard:** "Uggghhh I can't take this anymore."

**Esbern:** What seems to be troubling you?"

**Huntress Wizard:** "The new recruits from Riverwood…" *Chugs down Honningbrew Mead*

**Esbern:** "Ahh yes, I saw you training those new recruits allright. But perhaps you should just give them a chance. It is their first day after all."

**Huntress Wizard:** "See those Blue-Skinned Marauders Finn and Fionna recruited from Ooo and Aaa? They're fast learners and Honor Students compared to the little kiddies I'am stuck with."

**Esbern:** "Patience is a virtue."

**Huntress Wizard:** "How heartwarming."

**Esbern:** "You're just not doing it right."

**Huntress Wizard:** "Yippey-Kayey." (In a sarcastic manner)

**Esbern:** "Look Huntress, I'am The Blade's Lore Master. And I help solve problems; not problems like what is beauty or 'Am I still sexually attracted to Princess Bubblegum and wish I can still have sex with her? Even though she's already in a three-way relationship with her two lesbian vampire lovers'. Because that would fall in the purviews of your conundrums and philosophy."

Huntress Wizard was shocked and a bit appalled realizing Esbern knows that Huntress still has a crush with PB.

**Esbern:** "I solve practical problems… For instance, how do I help the Dragonborn and our recently acquired other-worldly friends like Finn and Jake, and Fionna and Cake stop that Lich King who was under Alduin's control from taking over all of Tamriel and potentially other universes out there in the Multiverse? The answer; I use knowledge and rational thinking. If that does not work? Remain calm and use more knowledge, common sense, and rational thinking." *Smiles widely at Huntress*

**Huntress Wizard:** …

**Esbern:** …

**Huntress Wizard:** "… How exactly does that help me in my situation?"

**Esbern:** "Well-"

**Huntress Wizard:** Zip it Old Man, break time's over."

Huntress Wizard chug down the last of her mead and stood up to the courtyard, the other members also stood up and so did Esbern to continue their daily schedule. Huntress Wizard came out first but as soon as she walked out something hit her in the head, a grenade thrown by Faendal accidently hit Huntress in the head.

**Faendal:** "INCOMING!"

**Sven:** "CAREFUL! WATCH OUT!"

**Huntress Wizard:** "RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA!" *Throws grenade*

Huntress Wizard, out of blind rage and anger blindly threw the grenade at a pile of explosive things and ordinances and Fire Salts belonging to Scorcher, when the other Blades came out they all quickly noticed Huntress lobbing that grenade at Scorcher's explosive ordinances and Fire Salt piles and everyone including Scorcher were shocked and yelled out of fear and ran back inside the temple. Esbern went out and wondered why everyone ran back inside until he learned why.

**Esbern:** "*GASP!* NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPE!"

**Sven and Faendal:** *Gulp* Uh oh."

**Huntress Wizard:** "FU!-"

_***BOOM!***_

#####

_*Hours later*_

After completing her mission to bring a batch of Royal Tarts from Princess Bubblegum in the Candy Kingdom to Prince Gumball and Jarl Elisif the Fair in Solitude, Delphine returned to Skyhaven Temple hoping to feel the warm welcome of home-sweet-home again. Only to not know what she's about to see.

**Delphine:** "Everyone, I'am back from bringing the Royal Tarts. I also saved some for- *GASP!*"

Delphine was speechless and her face was filled with horror at the sight of the damage although thankfully and miraculously; Skyhaven Temple itself was not destroyed by the explosion but the whole front of the building was covered in scorch and soot. The courtyard was burnt up and there was Sven, Faendal, Huntress Wizard, and now Esbern who were standing in the middle of the scorched yard and only now the other members went out to see the damage. Delphine's brain shut down as she fainted.

_*Music plays: __ watch?v=gIuotFZnBtk__ * _

Sven and Faendal felt sorry for Delphine and they now had sad looks on their faces, Huntress Wizard on the other hand was VERY furious and glared at the two angrily with gritting teeth. And she slapped both Sven and Faendal in the face; the sound of her slapping them echoed through the mountains and from the distance…

Huntress Wizard had A LOT of explaining to do later once Delphine awakes later…


	4. Dwarven Improvements

One of Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum's latest activities was studying the Dwemer technology and recently she has been working on one of the Dwememr Animunculi. She was amazed at the Dwarven Sphere and Centurion, mostly how well they perform but for awhile Bonnibel has been working on the Dwarven Sphere. She believed that she could improve the Animunculi and put them in much better use, for public and commercial use, or private and military use aswell; when she was not attending with the Jarls or any other political business in Skyrim she would go to Markarth and to the Understone Keep where she would study and work on improving on the Animunculi. Though Calcelmo often does not agree with Bonnibel's practices. (Princess Bubblegum always seems to have the toughest luck with Magic-Users, especially the Jarl's Court Mages.)

Until finally with the use of her scientific knowledge and some of the advanced technology she brought along to Skyrim she was able to ''improve'' a Dwarven Animunculi; a Dwarven Sphere into an Android and decided to unveil it in Markarth as a new Android to be used in security purposes and for military use.

**PB:** "Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the new and improved Dwarven Androids!" *An Android looking like a skinny Roman Gladiator appears* "Watch this."

*A group of captives, a bandit, a cuffed Thieves Guild member, and a captured Dark Brotherhood Assassin are released and thrown into the arena with the Android*

**PB:** "I've basically took the Dwarven Spheres, removed their wheels and their way forming into spheres. And just converted them into Androids; robots that look like humans, also they are now powered by energy like electricity than steam. Now here comes the fun part. Pepbut! Give that Gladiator its directives!" *Looks at captive bandits* "You want parole? THEN PROVE IT!"

*The captives charge at the Android*

**Bandit:** "I'll smash the machine to pieces!"

**Thief:** "Wonder how much its scrap metal's worth."

*Android sprints fast and drwas retractable wrist mounted blades*

**Bandit:** "WHOA! THAT THINGS FAST-" *Violence* *Dead*

**Android:** "I'am not gonna fight you, I'am gonna kick your ass." *Charges at Thief*

**Thief:** "NOPE! NOPE! NOPE! NOPE!" *Tries to run away but is stabbed to death*

*Assassin turns invisible and uses Ice Spike at Android. IT'S INEFFECTIVE!*

**Android:** "Now I'am really pissed off" *See's Assassin through its optics and charges at target*

**Assassin:** "Maybe it won't see me, maybe it won't see- BY SITHIS! NOO! *Violence* *dead*

**Android:** "Easy, any day."

**PB:** "As you can see these Android are armed with wrist mounted swords or blades made from Titanium and can cut through many types of armor like butter, they have an advanced combat AI which makes them fight even the toughest and sneakiest enemies; even a Dragon. And they're made of titanium and have lightweight BUT tough armor unlike that heavy and extremely cumbersome Dwarven metals and can move REALLY fast and jump up to five to ten feet."

*Crowd whistles in awe*

However not everyone was amused by the show, asides from Calcelmo not being exactly supportive of Bonni, a certain Elven Justiciar felt she was ''Plagarizing''.

**Ondolemar**: "How dare you Bonnibel taking something from the Dwemer and claiming it as yours? You even design that machine after humans; even though it was originally by Mer."

**PB:** "Seriously? The almighty Aldmeri Dominion has nothing better to do but whine about something that's not Elven?"

**Ondolemar:** "You took the Dwemer Animunculi design and plagiarized it. And Calcelmo has every right to be displeased at you."

**Calcelmo:** "Oh shut up; don't talk as if we're in equal terms. You're just complaining about something that does not look like an Altmer, and you're acting as if it's the Thalmor's; you probably know nothing much about Dwemer aswell. Atleast Bonnibel here acknowledges it; even though I do not like her methods modernizing the Dwemer machinery.

**PB:** Understood, and besides the Androids don't even look human, they're humanoid. As in human-like bodies.

**Ondolemar:** Even if that's the case. How do we know that those "Robots" are not something to be used against the Dominion?"

**PB:** "Well I openly invited you to the presentation. Even though the Androids that are still under-development are weapons, we're using them for security and protection. If its so Un-Elvenly why not just build your own? Instead of whining about it not looking like an Elf.

**Ondolemar:** Perhaps the Aldmeri Dominion CAN AND WILL build something far more superior. Thus proving Elven supremacy over Ooo and Aaa; especially over Man.

**PB:** *giggle* "I find it funny that you 'High Elves' are soooo superior over humans. When one of you, especially a certain respected official is crazy over a boy."

**Ondolemar:** "What?"

**PB:** "Well the Thalmor Embassy always seems to let a fifteen year old teenager in every weekends. It seems madam Elenwen enjoys Finn's company every lovely fridays and saturdays; and she'd like him to be very close and dominant in their relationship.

*everyone else listens closely*

**Ondolemar:** "…Don't you dare bring up that topic as an argument."

**PB:** "And she's all head-over-heels and is like. 'Oh Finn baby my Prince Charming I miss you so much.' 'And I miss you to my pretty Princess.'"

*everyone else including Jarl Ingmund and Calcelmo laughs*

**Ondolemar:** "Miss Elenwen's love lif- err uhh. I mean freetime is nothing to be concerned of."

**PB:** "'Finn take off my robes it so hot in here.' 'Anything for my Princess.'

*everyone else laughs*

**Ondolemar:** "SHUT UP!" *blushes madly*

**PB:** "'Hold me close my Prince; kiss me with your lushious lips.' 'What do you say first my Little Princess?' 'Please my oh so powerful Prince; touch me, hold me, kiss me in the cheeks.'

*everyone else laughs*

**Ondolemar:** OH YEAH!? Well. You have sex with two vampires. You Necrophiliac HAH!

**Everyone else:** Pffffftt BOOOOOOOOO! LAME!

**PB:** "'Finn kiss my cheeks." 'Yes mi lady, mwah!' 'No I mean kiss me in the buttcheeks.'

**Everyone else:** "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH! HAAHHAHA!

**Thongvar Silver-Blood:** "What's the matter? Got nothing to say to the pink princess? HA!"

**Calcelmo:** "I have to say brother Elf, you can't argue with that. Especially if it's more of a reality ehehe."

**Ondolemar:** Grrr. How immature of you all. *angrily stomps back to Understone Keep*

**Ingmund:** "Yes go ahead and back to Understone Keep. Maybe you need cool off, hehe.

###

Ondolemar angrily stomped his way back at the Understone Keep with his two soldiers accompanying him as usual.

*Ondolemar angrily paces back and fourth with his two Soldiers accompanying him as usual*

**Ondolemar**: "I DON'T BELEIVE THAT-THAT NAMBY PAMBY PINK PRINCESS! Who does she think she is? She plagiarizes Elven technology, and she dares to speak such things like that about a respected person of the Thalmor IN FRONT OF ME! I Swear that candy princess will- What smells like candy? *sniffs the air and looks at one of the Thalmor Soldiers accompanying him* You, take of your chest piece."

**Thalmor Soldier 1**: "Sir?"

**Ondolemar**: "Take it off. TAKE IT OFF!"

*Soldier takes off armor and is seen wearing a t-shirt either saying "Come visit the Land of Ooo/Aaa" or "I've been in the Candy Kingdom, and it's SWEET! Also my shirt's strawberry and cream scented"*

**Ondolemar**: "YOU'RE WEARING THEIR INFERNAL PRODUCTS!? WHY ARE YOU WEARING THAT?! WHY WEAR SOMETHING THAT REPRESENTS A SORRY EXCUSE FOR A KINGDOM!?"

**Thalmor Soldier 1**: "Well I was in Ooo one time and honestly I kinda like the Candy Kingdom besides other brethren Mer are also liking Ooo and Aaa. I-I I even also heard many of us have now migrated to Ooo or Aaa to go to the Breakfast Kingdom because of their fine cuisine-"

**Ondolemar**: "WHAAAAAT!?"

**Thalmor Soldier 1**: "Ooo and Aaa's really not tha-"

**Ondolemar**: "I CAN'T BELEIVE THERE ARE TRAITOROUS SCUM THAT'S ABANDONING THE DOMINION JUST TO LIVE IN A LAND FILLED WITH TALKING CANDY, BELLIGERENT FLAME ATRONACHS, IMMATURE VAMPIRES, SENTIENT OBJECTS AND ANIMALS, MANGY LITTLE GOBLINS, AND WHERE IT RAINS KNIVES! AND FOR THE LOVE OF AURI-EL TAKE OF THAT DAMN SHIRT NOW-"

*SLURP*

*Ondolemar looks at the second Soldier sipping Wildberry Princess brand juice*

**Thalmor Soldier 2**: *Sipping imported Wildberry Princess brand juice* "…. Thirsty?"

*Ondolemar gets pissed of whacks at the Soldier with his Mace and KO's him*

**Ondolemar:** "YOU TWO ARE SHAMEFUL! Is there any other member of the Thalmor not fallen for that land's crazy influences!?"

*Meanwhile Elenwen is at her office sniffing Finn's shirt who unintentionally left it behind*


End file.
